The number one strategy that we have allowed the enemy to use in our marriages for thousands of years is the spirit of division. His entire intention is to effectively remove and sever a husband's relationship with his wife and a father's relationship with his children.
The couples that we support in marriage counseling almost always say it is the other persons fault. If she would just.... If he would just.... He always does this..... She always does that.... etc. The main theme or common thread that I see that complicates solving these marriage issues is wrapped up in one word called SELFISHNESS, "You be selfish, and I'll be selfish" resulting in a formula for killing that relationship. If we continue to do our own thing and keep doing what comes naturally to us, it will ultimately end up destroying our marriage.
Like it or not, we do have an enemy, and his name is Satan, and the bible says in John 10:10 that the enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy, I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
But the flip side of this is when the husband and wife refuse to allow anything to divide them. When emotional energies are not spent on fighting one another and used constructively to encourage and build one another up and then turning around and encouraging the children, everything can change!
Trust is what motivates people to follow our leadership, whether at work or at home. Trust must be earned. The husband has been given authority in the home by God, just as the captain of a hockey team has been given the voice to speak for their team. They were appointed to be the head. If the husband is a godly man who has a biblical vision for his family and leads to the best of his ability in the things of the Spirit, a godly wife should be willing to follow his leadership and support him in it. It takes all the pressure off of us as women, because even if we disagree with our husband's decision, we can agree to disagree and let go, knowing he is ultimately responsible before God. Pray for your husband if you believe he is out of balance on his decision making and ask God to open up the eyes of his understanding so he can see. This is the recipe for a healthy relationship. Coming under each others mission with support, care and love!
Scripture indicates that God holds the man responsible for decisions made in the family - Gen. 3:1-13 - ultimately God held Adam accountable for those choices, just as an executive would be held responsible for decisions made in a department.
Once we know that the enemy's #1 strategy is to bring division in our marriage, then we are responsible to counteract his attempts by using the sword of the spirit, which is the Word of God. We will need to get our eyes off of the problem and onto a solution if we want peace in our marriage and family.
2 Corinthians 10:4 says, "For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ...."